indignant –

compassion starved from

insatiable insensitivity…

how can there be justification

for callous abandon?

all too often it seems we

close doors,

build walls,

create barricades –

manipulate emotions to protect our hearts from hurt,

yet find,

in the end,

our – selves – starving for a touch –

gentle caress…

friendship –

sweet reprieve for our emaciated souls –

never realized!

i long to be the – oh –

the – wow –

exhilarating gasp of – awe,

in an otherwise quiet room!

to be that –

suspect,

that –

even remotely – considered.

to be –

consumed –

as breath –

entering in –

and back out again.

unassuming,

yet essential –

inasmuch as believe,

to dream…

you are that –

Deity –

on which i hang

(effortlessly)

my hope.

demagogue to champion compassion.

and i –

your willing martyr!

i hear your sadness

screaming through the silence…

big sky –

little moon –

somewhere on the other side of my world,

you –

behind the clouds…

what absence do you run from –

what darkness terror

keeps you locked away?

safe inside your guarded walls

i cannot reach you…

what feeling worse than lonely –

what pain more real than

breaking heart,

outstretched hand – empty –

unanswered prayer…

broken still –

emotion spilled into a void –

longing cuts like shards of glass –

the soul…

you are my pain,

and passion,

self-contained!

oh my duplicitous Pygmalion!

while you were sleeping,

i was years away…

… trapped,

as you would say –

contained within my pre-assembled tomb of ambiguity.

but there is where i find –

i,

my – me…

and while you walk in circles

around my truth,

expecting walls of nonchalance to crumble,

i smile –

free of your contagious animosity…

how simply –

archaic!

your words,

so fervent in their request to be my savior –

however,

your eyes do not invite –

and your clinched fists can never hold these trembling hands…

from here to there

and back again,

(past the other side of now – to then)…

(trees hold their memories;

knots and scars,

an aged leaf holding on past it’s season…)

what is it –

about a winters day –

takes you to that place;

serene,

un-compromised –

a smile with no qualification,

peace of mind…

(squirrels know the trees’ secrets),

to sit –

for hours in the mid-day sun –

contemplating –

nothing…

oh the rush!

(and still the dying leaf – holds on…)

once upon a – not so long ago;

before the now,

was then,

soon after that first,

hello…

(Eden – well,

at least some acceptable facsimile),

there was a you, i knew –

and a me you,

although – reluctantly, allowed admittance…

why is it – in the light –

all demons – disappear?

aren’t they – by nature – invincible?

if can’t is not allowed to become is,

what then?

this timid soul does not possess the strength to slay

even the most subtle dragon,

and nowhere in the manual of supposition

is there an option – to just – be!

indignant –

of you to assume!

your judgment falls like hail upon the road –

undisclosed to one –

further along the journey!

unable,

to define the reason

for the need –

incapable of justifying cause.

restrained within a room of solitude,

dreamless sleep,

from which,

no waking!

intermittently,

like sun through broken clouds,

i realize the dawn –

sweet recompense for midnight’s darkness –

and there –

on the horizon,

you –

resplendent in your wholesome goodness –

savior from this insanity…