Author Archives: boyfrommville

behind the looking glass

and in the space –
behind the mirror –
your – unafraid –
encouraged my – inability.
as years of hiding in the dark
left me,
weak,
incapable…
 
how arduous,
this task.
reflecting;
not fondly on the journey.
rather,
as the surface of a most placid sea –
showing merely the reflection
of what
you expect to see…
Leave a comment

gregarious – assiduous – raisonde’tre; You…

incidentally –
you,
reconstruct the broken –
remand the lies, to truth…
 
effortless as –
breath,
yet more required!
 
tangible –
yet restrained.
unassumingly – understanding…
 
how is it –
there can be – debate,
supposition,
disbelief,
in the plausibility of my need,
for your existence?
 
unobtrusive as dawn,
you force the darkness into light.
eliminate – might.
replace – could-be – with is!
 
captive,
am i –
paralyzed by your compassion.
in awe –
of your most enigmatic –
consideration!
Leave a comment

a box of after-while

…today –
you passed me on the street.
for a moment our eyes met.
i formed a smile, greeted you.
you turned your head and walked away.
 
as i continued along my journey,
i debated with myself – what did i do?
what impression did i give that warranted indifference?
confused.
uncertain.
i placed the moment in my box of “after-while” –
consideration for another day.
 
today i messaged you.
excited to share a “guess-what?”.
busy,
you promised conversation some other time –
another day.
perhaps i read more into your dismissal than i should.
just maybe,
i held on too long to my expectation of your when –
misconstrued your (un)intention.
 
today –
i waited for you.
anticipated the familiar comfort of your voice.
impatiently counted the minutes until your arrival.
rehearsed with eager enthusiasm my words expressing joy at your return.
but today,
you did not –
return.
 
and standing here,
commiserating with just myself,
i understood the sadness of alone –
the deafening roar of silence –
the numbing pain –
of your most callous – inconsideration…
Leave a comment

and standing there…

and standing there –
on that great shore –
i watched you wave goodbye…
 
no words.
no sound dare interrupt
the reverence of that moment.
earth – touched sky.
winds ceased.
all creation – still…
 
i imagine that you thought
of summer,
when still a child.
the innocence of life before the knowing.
and possibly,
fond memories shared with family,
with friends.
 
and standing there –
on that great shore-
i saw your bright eyes shining.
effervescence – in your smile.
no sorrow – no fear –
no wonder,
in your going –
 
away…
 
and standing there –
on that great shore –
as oh so gentle – the sun kissed the sea,
you were gone.
knowing that today,
i cannot follow –
i wrap your memory in my heart.
hold tightly to my thoughts.
until again –
on that great shore –
you wave once more,
and i too – travel home…
Leave a comment

choices

what do i do
with all these thoughts of you,
trapped in my head –
like a fly in the spider’s web…
 
like the moth drawn to the flame,
i push against the pull –
but the effort –
all in vain…
 
submersed in thoughts of you,
i waste away –
no struggle against the drowning –
will,
washed away.
 
no need to throw a rope of hope –
i chose to lose my way..
Leave a comment

unobliged

to make it stop.
the endless sound of waves upon the shore.
the hissing of the setting sun –
sliding without reluctance into the sea.
the wailing of the dying –
day –
sad victim to the night.
 
to simply make it –
stop.
 
in the sweet escape of that moment –
removed from the evidence of sound –
no contemplation of why,
or what,
or even reference to suppose.
in that sacred situation of nothing –
to merely – be.
 
how seductive – thoughts of unbecoming.
to exit – quiet – from the courtroom of disallowed.
free at last from chains of should.
unbound – no longer – by petitions of presume.
pardoned from occurrence of something –
unobliged –
obligated to –
nothing…
Leave a comment

thread of life

 

inside my head,

the thoughts of you –

collect like raindrops in a sieve…

 

i cannot hold them,

so they fall in puddles

on the floor…

 

saturated with these feelings,

i fear the levy soon will break,

and i’ll pour out upon myself.

 

if so released –

where will i run?

all i’ve ever known of life

is how to be restrained.

 

you de-construct all my defenses,

thaw this soul –

frozen from a lack of touch,

a life of discontent.

 

i wonder,

with those liquid pools of comfort,

how it is –

you cannot see –

the magnitude of what you mean to me…

 

strong,

secure –

you are the very thread

of the fabric of my sanity!

Leave a comment

the chasm

this post for you.
the many that stopped along their journey to pick up stones.
irrelevant,
i suppose,
assignment of conduct as predetermined –
defined –
painstakingly deliberate.
 
regardless the supposition –
in spite of deference of arbitration –
you chose to throw opinion into the chasm of my demise.
 
contrived.
maliciously ostentatious.
your character defined by absence of even a glimmer of humanity.
conspicuously infantile,
i listen to you speak to acts of reconciliation for my sins –
recompense required to rectify my resistance to your (implied) authority.
and even as i grasp for option of absolution,
i feel the weight of intolerance crushing apathetically my refuge of hope.
and from your eyes –
blank stare.
from which no light dare enter,
or if detained,
escape…
Leave a comment

and just about now.

and just about now,
while the stars shine and the moon is slightly less than full, we wage wars against ourselves.
in this moment, instead of holding hands, we throw sparks – rekindle flames – ignite with fear the fires of discontent.
what will it accomplish? this war of indifference?
if in the end – when the smoke finally clears – we find all we’ve conquered – is good;
all that remains – draped in darkness-
sad shroud of victory worn by kings without crowns –
left only to reign over the grave of morality.
and so it goes…
 
and just about now,
we boast and brag of conquests made in the name of jurisprudence –
encroach upon the boundaries of right and wrong –
yet fail to comprehend the majesty of benevolence.

and just about – now –
while making plans to ostracize God from our concept of creation –
we fail to realize the structure of our once great society is falling down –
thin walls of faith,
collapsing in upon themselves,
weakened – by the senseless acts – inhumanity of man –
 
and just about now –
the reality of our demise is heard –
not in the roar of mighty storms –
but subtle as the exit of day –
more personal than a whisper of consolation,
from the very lips of death…
 
(and now i lay me down to sleep ,
i pray the Lord,
my soul…)
Leave a comment

the possibility of

and there –
on the horizon –
setting sun…
 
did you make a difference today?
did you color outside the lines?
 
did you disallow the urge to follow cadence?
march instead to the beat of your own drum?
 
i find it oh so intriguing the way sunlight captures day,
holds it – indisposed,
then sets it free…
 
and once again nightfall.
prelude to the possibility of –
(another day of) anything,
 
or – nothing…
Leave a comment