Author Archives: boyfrommville

further along the journey

once upon a –

not so long ago;

before the now,

was then.

soon after that first,

hello…

 

(Eden –

well,

at least some acceptable facsimile),

 

there was a you,

i knew –

and a me you,

although – reluctantly –

allowed –

admittance…

 

why is it –

in the light –

all demons – disappear?

aren’t they –

by nature –

invincible?

 

if can’t is not allowed to become is,

what then?

 

this timid soul does not posses the strength to slay

even the most subtle dragon,

and nowhere in the manual of supposition

is there an option –

to just – be!

 

indignant –

of you to assume!

 

your judgment falls like hail upon the road –

undisclosed to one –

further along the journey!

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into the desolation

solitude –

precursor to loneliness.

 

disassociation of self –

from soul.

 

plunged head first –

into this desolation…

 

where do you turn to find

acceptance –

what price – the need?

 

compassion comes,

but not without cost.

 

smiles –

transparent,

masking pain –

unrealized.

 

abandon –

cruel nemesis to faith,

prevails –

 

hurt sustains!

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unbecoming

 

wanting more than less –

needing more than have –

i find my life in shadow,

standing still…

 

consumed by doubt –

entombed within the walls of disbelief –

i feel the madness creep

into my living,

forcing me to contemplate my fate.

 

do i seek refuge here

in dying’s harbor?

commit to nothing –

become un-done?

 

how simple then,

the letting go –

no need –

for need,

no longing –

to belong…

 

so sweet the peace that

must come with the passing.

so great the un-weight,

un-encumbered –

un-entwined –

the soul,

aged captive –

finally free…

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fountain of you…

 

far deeper than any touch,

much more real,

than feel –

 

unlike whispers

fading into the air,

carried away too soon –

you are the – air!

 

all inclusive,

pervasive as nightfall –

you seep into every pore of my being,

filling every cavity of my soul!

 

i drink you in –

the thirst never satisfied,

and so i must return,

time and again,

to your most pensive fountain!

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breath

that which you are –

intrigues me –

the depth of your eyes;

a vortex that pulls me in –

the warmth of your smile enlightens me…

 

wherever i go –

you go –

for i carry you in my heart.

 

irreplaceable as light –

delight more grand than sound

to one who cannot hear –

i keep you near,

cornerstone of every dream…

 

more than – just enough,

intrusive as – is –

merely hearing your voice throws chaos to the wind –

and when we touch –

my entire existence bends!

 

you are the air –

mere breath i long to breathe!

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i – in bondage…

what i saw in you –

i needed to see in me.

and what i felt for you –

was what was missing from my life.

 

like a hand given –

but not taken,

a glance –

not returned…

 

desperation –

a weight – too heavy for this heart to hold,

chains of bondage –

locked tight,

and you,

the key!

 

 

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standing too close to the edge…

dangling –

here –

mere inches from release,

terrified to lose control!

 

pondering –

the forward,

and reverse –

confused,

unsure…

 

what if i take the step –

will my footing hold?

the edge is much too close,

and i am yet afraid…

 

that nothing will replace

the insignificance i have become

and i’ll fall –

headlong –

into less than –

something –

 

un-missed,

a stone thrown in the pond –

so small –

no sound,

no tell-tale –

ripples!

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gregarious – assiduous – raisonde’tre; You…

incidentally –

you,

reconstruct the broken –

remand the lies, to truth…

 

effortless as –

breathe,

yet more required!

tangible –

yet restrained.

unassumingly – understanding…

 

how is it –

there can be – debate,

supposition,

disbelief,

in the plausibility of my need for your existence?

 

unobtrusive as dawn,

you force the darkness into light.

eliminate – might.

replace – could-be – with is!

 

captive,

am i –

paralyzed by your compassion.

in awe –

of your most enigmatic –

consideration!

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unbecoming

wanting more than less –

needing more than have –

i find my life in shadow,

standing still…

 

consumed by doubt –

entombed within the walls of disbelief –

i feel the madness creep

into my living,

forcing me to contemplate my fate.

 

do i seek refuge here

in dying’s harbor?

commit to nothing –

become un-done?

 

how simple then,

the letting go –

no need –

for need,

no longing –

to belong…

 

so sweet the peace that

must come with the passing.

so great the un-weight,

un-encumbered –

un-entwined –

the soul,

aged captive –

finally free…

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broken hearts

there are some things –

          superficial –

          easily seen by –

          everyone –

               anyone!

 

those things characterize,

          silhouette by

          shape,

               by sound.

 

deeper though –

          seen scantly,

          like constellations through broken clouds –

          there are those more personal things.

 

like pearls –

          we search,

          and probe –

          picking over –

          breaking down –

          looking desperately for that great prize –

          and in the search –

          missing out on the most precious jewels.

 

cast away –

          like broken shells –

          we clutter the beaches of life !

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