there are some things –

          superficial –

          easily seen by –

          everyone –

               anyone!

those things characterize,

          silhouette by

          shape,

               by sound.

deeper though –

          seen scantly,

          like constellations through broken clouds –

          there are those more personal things.

like pearls –

          we search,

          and probe –

          picking over –

          breaking down –

          looking desperately for that great prize –

          and in the search –

          missing out on the most precious jewels.

cast away –

          like broken shells –

          we clutter the beaches of life !

oh my duplicitous Pygmalion!

while you were sleeping,

i was years away…

… trapped,

as you would say –

contained within my pre-assembled tomb of ambiguity.

but there is where i find –

i,

my – me…

and while you walk in circles

around my truth,

expecting walls of nonchalance to crumble,

i smile –

free of your contagious animosity…

how simply –

archaic!

your words,

so fervent in their request to be my savior –

however,

your eyes do not invite –

and your clinched fists can never hold these trembling hands…

age –

simply defined;

a collection of years,

or perhaps –

seasons.

society puts up fences –

youth here,

old age there,

either, or…

i find my place neither

in, nor out –

and so i sit upon the fence –

dangling my feet,

and my heart,

in both pastures.

this moment –

borrowed,

short –

precious…

it hangs on – briefly;

a breath held in anticipation –

skipped beat of a heart –

first babies cry…

awesome – don’t you think –

this journey called life?

it seems so many times –

we get caught up in the – want –

involved in expectation;

preoccupied with – when –

so much that we miss out on the – now…

my – is –

this – moment;

all i need,

and all i’m guaranteed –

you may choose another agenda –

fill your days,

your – moments –

with – what if…

but -i,

i choose – acceptance,

gratitude,

appreciation –

each breath –

each moment –

sweet gift of life –

amazing!

sitting on the shore –

watching reflections on the water;

yellow sun,

blue sky –

solitary bird flying into the horizon…

how small – am i –

in a world so big,

how insignificant…

why do i wake?

routinely do the things i do?

for what purpose?

i throw a stone into the water –

causing ripples –

disturbing the placid serenity –

and for a moment – i am known!

but the water is deep,

my pebble – oh so small –

and once again – the surface still…

i cannot believe that there is no tomorrow –

no sunrise chasing night – no need to – believe…

for surely – God – in all his greatness –

created more than this small holder of dreams –

and even when i cease to be –

in this place –

i will most surely –

rise again!

great is my faith –

oh so strong my belief!

indisposed –

un-entwined –

unattached – affection.

where do you turn

when doors are closed,

access – denied?

emotion – spent.

un-realized – intent.

what becomes of feelings – disallowed?

unmarked – grave.

requiem – undisclosed.

eulogy of silence

for life lived in the fringe,

of suppose…