no celebration.

no revelation of dreams come true.

life begins and ends –

regardless pageantry,

in spite of pomp and circumstance.

while accoutrements of consideration add a deviation to the rhythm,

they alter not the designation of its passage.

true,

we can argue the benefit of correspondence.

for purpose of justification,

we can extol the value of accommodation.

while some may find the journey cumbersome in their pursuit of a conceptualized destination,

others engage in active pursuit of extracting every ounce of occupation from each moment traveled in time.

alas,

twilight.

fading flickers of light absorbed into the was.

and as i stand facing the horizon of a brand new is,

i realize the absence of anticipation.

irrelevant –

the should-have –

the could-have –

the did-not.

all empty shells strewn upon an abandoned beach.

if allowed passage to the garden of tomorrow,

i will pursue with diligence the expectation of blessing –

reverence in the presence of allowed…

needing more than have –

i find my life in shadow,

standing still…

consumed by doubt –

entombed within the walls of disbelief –

i feel the madness creep

into my living,

forcing me to contemplate my fate.

do i seek refuge here

in dying’s harbor?

commit to nothing –

become un-done?

how simple then,

the letting go –

no need –

for need,

no longing –

to belong…

so sweet the peace that

must come with the passing.

so great the un-weight,

unencumbered –

un-entwined –

the soul,

aged captive –

finally free…

words we offer.

superfluous incantations.

so easy to speak to sadness when unaffected –

merely spectator to the tragedy.

symbolically,

we promenade our good intentions –

feign allegiance to the victims of indifference.

but when the shadows fall,

retire to our catacombs of selfish insensitivity.

where did the disconnect occur?

at what point along our journey did we simply abandon the side-car of compassion –

exchange our tickets of camaraderie for self-serving vehicles of elitism?

tomorrow,

regardless our attempt at manipulation,

life will continue.

as much as we choose to disregard injustice,

the reality of conflict will remain.

those that find confidence behind masks of inferred generosity –

imagine restitution paid by superficial acts of benevolence –

will sadly find admittance to paradise denied –

disallowed  by supposed inclusion by intention…

words,

we offer –

prayers for forgiveness.

dialogue for recompense.

heads bowed,

unintentional act of respect –

eyes closed,

irreverent –

surely there can be no penalty of judgment –

for crimes we choose not to see…

this post – 

specific – 

intended. 

undeniably – unobtrusive.

words that speak from a shrine of good intention.

words that speak to humble – 

humility.

words that speak from a platform of compassion –

across the silence of a room of doubt…

it seems –

sometimes –

the closer we become to who we are, 

the further away we move from our comfort zone.

suddenly the definition – 

the boundaries –

the allowed,

becomes muted. 

uncertainty colored gray replaces the black and white contrast.

is –

becomes could,

should gets consumed by can’t.

as we search for answers to questions we have not the courage to ask, 

our serenity disappears –

lost in the chaos of despair…

these words –

surreptitiously culled from dissertations of faith –

sermons of solidarity.

and yet i wonder if you hear them through the discord of your lamentations.

prayers – i pray.

application for license to disarm.

all the while –

you remain isolated –

entombed within a vault of disbelief.

unable to see over walls built to disallow insurgence of attack –

denigration of emotional stability –

that in effect,

have become prisons

of self-imposed

indifference…