dangling –

here –

mere inches from release,

terrified to lose control!

pondering –

the forward,

and reverse –

confused,

unsure…

what if i take the step –

will my footing hold?

the edge is much too close,

and i am yet afraid…

that nothing will replace

the insignificance i have become

and i’ll fall –

headlong –

into less than –

something –

un-missed,

a stone thrown in the pond –

so small –

no sound,

no tell-tale –

ripples!

i found myself –

upon the shore –

gazing in your eyes –

calm –

deep water.

i wanted you to know me –

feel my presence.

without – hesitation –

or reservation –

i tossed the stone…

ripples –

endless waves –

flowing outward.

and even if i wanted –

i could not stop them –

or even withdraw the effect

of my most curious touch

on your enigmatic mind!

indisposed –

un-entwined –

unattached – affection.

where do you turn

when doors are closed,

access – denied?

emotion – spent.

un-realized – intent.

what becomes of feelings – disallowed?

unmarked – grave.

requiem – undisclosed.

eulogy of silence

for life lived in the fringe,

of suppose…

entangled in

my now –

entwined within

my what-will-be,

you…

an anchor fastened to my heart –

essential as even –

air.

what was life before

you –

who drew the line

between indifferent –

and necessary?

was there sunlight –

or did the night – so nonchalant

just close his eyes –

allowing day…

i cherish moments

filled with oh-so-much of you,

grateful –

yet undeserving…

the place we sometimes journey to –

is much too dark to stay,

too far away for words,

more deep than sound –

profound as black on white,

or even still,

the very absence of light…

attempting once again to feel,

we dive head first into the –

nothing,

to somehow feel the splash –

of something…

as delicate as if,

more frail than why –

the sanity we seek to find,

evasive –

hides behind the clouds,

that clutter the skyline of our mind!

indignant –

compassion starved from

insatiable insensitivity…

how can there be justification

for callous abandon?

all too often it seems we

close doors,

build walls,

create barricades –

manipulate emotions to protect our hearts from hurt,

yet find,

in the end,

our – selves – starving for a touch –

gentle caress…

friendship –

sweet reprieve for our emaciated souls!

i long to be – to you –

all that you have become –

to me…

that first sliver of sun at dawn,

or the twinkle of twilight’s

first star…

if only i could fill your world with wonderful,

exceptional –

smother you with fantastic,

awesomely – amazing…

if even for one solitary second

i could be

that which flows through your veins –

fills your heart –

gives you life,

how great the rush –

to be considered something so essential –

so necessary!

as much as air –

as incidental as day –

i long to be the impulse for your smile,

casual sigh,

the beat your heart skips…

everything to –

you –

to me –

you are…