into the maddening sea –
head first –
eyes – wide-open…
where did it go?
my foothold.
the ledge seemed oh so strong,
and me,
myself,
and i,
so little of not much-at-all…
drowning now –
sadness so deep –
no rope of hope –
no walking on this water…
where did you go?
sweet child of mine.
i held your hand,
but you held the beat of my heart.
no one is ever,
nobody –
everyone is always,
someone.
bizarre –
presumptions;
indecently – audacious!
what mirror,
broken,
persuaded you to focus on the fractures?
surely you realize –
the cracks;
visible scars,
evidence of healing…
yet there you remain –
self contained.
defiant in your arrogantly-assumed piety.
compassion safely contained behind a transparent veil!
truly –
nothing conceived within this mind,
i presume –
could ever explain –
the ebb and flow (tide) of life.
you,
however,
engulfed in the glow of all-knowing ( – the moon),
refuse to even – suppose…
enigmatic as light,
to dark;
your insatiable attraction
to – your you!
and i –
hiding behind your mirror –
remain all you can never see…
is your anything –
really better,
than the everything of me?
we hold on to our pain –
sometimes the only thing we feel –
scared to let it go,
afraid of – nothing…
empty –
a vessel of capability,
unfilled;
hands reaching for intention,
unrecognized…
so cold – the absence
of light;
no darkness more deep
than feeling all alone.
imagine this –
touch,
without feel…
un-know
the un-truth
that all at once, no longer matters.
for,
gone is now –
the yesterday of your –
tomorrow;
the – reality – of your – is…
subtle,
don’t you think?
the way it,
becomes was?
and yet we feel,
the same as – always – us!
i am in need,
please,
come to me.
take this heart,
this soul,
this mind,
and mold me in your hands.
listen to my thoughts,
my hopes,
my dreams,
and try to understand.
and if you see the need,
take this life,
and create in it some dream come true,
or devise a master plan
to undo –
un-mold –
destroy…
life –
is such a fragile toy!
mis-conception.
intent,
mis-construed…
what can you possibly possess
to conquer the threat of complacency
when burning bridges remove even the rumor of retreat?
stranded now, in the light –
how will you hide your insecurity?
you truly believe in clarity –
life free from the obnubilation of despair?
indignant,
you have become –
consumed by your obtrude self-deprecation.
un-justified –
un-worthy.
insignificant as light,
to one that cannot see…
is – does not understand,
could –
(possibility – not yet defined?).
inside the paradigms of his reality,
now is real.
(if you have now, was no longer matters).
how odd –
to be,
yesterday.
quite full of what was,
and what mattered,
and even – what if,
but never as necessary,
or as current,
as – what is!
sad,
don’t you think?
requiems for want,
not yet realized;
but not one single tear for had…
(how quickly we forget).
my feelings –
alien to you as much as – secure is to timid,
shatter like shards of glass against your narcissistic walls…
how awesome,
it must be –
being you;
how – required!
pompous as an apostrophe –
owning possession,
and the power to unite –
yet completely – unaffected!
and while you dangle effortless,
unencumbered –
I remain tied to the weight of my own culpability.
necessary,
you are –
more than any imagined ownership.
for without you,
meaning is lost;
and I become irrelevant as a useless preposition –
alone – without the companion of my most reluctant ,
yet oh so necessary –
object…
what i saw in you –
i needed to see in me.
and what i felt for you –
was what was missing from my life.
like a hand given –
but not taken,
a glance –
not returned…
desperation –
a weight – too heavy for this heart to hold,
chains of bondage –
locked tight,
and you,
the key!
standing too close to the edge 