awakening

some days,
stand out as beacons along the timeline of our lives.
perhaps occasion worthy of remembrance.
maybe a moment of blessing in a season of chaos.
sometimes,
however,
the monument is not viewed from perspective of celebration.
it seems those days we struggle just to survive.
take refuge in the darkness – path of least resistance.
finding it easier to allow than to defy,
we close our eyes –
wear the shame of defeat…
and yet –
if we were to stand against the waves –
place with deliberation our foundation upon the shore –
what would it matter – the tide?
as quickly as it approaches,
it departs.
and even though the surge rushes to the shore –
it simply cannot overcome the boundaries of allowed.
so too fear.
entity of can’t and will not.
demagogue of dissonance.
king of should have been – without a throne –
bashed by the waves upon rocks of will become.
scattered as broken light upon a placid sea –
memory fading with each dying ember –
consumed within the silence of forget.
and on the horizon –
setting sun –
waking with fingers of twilight –
from dreams of peaceful sleep –
the prelude to our new tomorrow –
wrapped –
ever so secure –
opportunity –
from the resting bed of night…

malady of assume

i will surrender –
allow silence to enter the realm of my consideration.
not that i’ve emptied the vat of thought.
rest assured there is chaos yet to corral –
imaginings to share –
inferences to propose.
in time.
just not tonight.
 
i would suggest,
however,
opinion kept in check.
sometimes more is said with silence than ramblings of un-intent.
perhaps a conversation –
cut short –
left fragments of suppose scattered along the floor of deliberation.
or,
possibly,
attention was not paid in full –
recipient left holding hands full of not quite enough.
 
so eagerly we hand out labels of indifference.
cast stones of unconcern.
yet fail to recognize our own misappropriation of bias –
fall victim to the malady of assume…

perhaps ignored…

questions unanswered.
a lifetime of contemplated what-if’s.
presumptions –
insinuations –
allegations substantiated?
or denied?
 
at what point in the evolution of our us,
did we stumble upon the arrogance of autonomy?
 
signs of welcome we hang outside our door.
enter here!
come inside!
take shelter from the storm.
but just as the rain sets in,
we pull the plug;
no room at this inn…
 
how sad,
to find at this juncture,
closed doors.
when with such little effort the lock could be removed.
 
what’s that?
i thought i heard you saying prayers – counting blessings.
surely it was just the moaning of the wind.
 
obstinate –
one would presume –
the image of yet another self-proclaimed demagogue sequestered in a sanctuary of self –
while just outside the door –
clinging to the tattered remnants of hope,
a lost and lonely soul –
just within reach of salvation,
cries –
unheard.
or perhaps –
 
simply ignored…

to the world

ice is forming –
on the windows –
now.
i hear the whistle of the wind –
its song,
so sad!
 
everywhere –
in cold secluded –
silence.
every-thing – captured
within grey!
 
no longer do the birds
in joyful chorus-
sing happily their songs.
their words lie frozen –
broken as the surface of the sky.
 
i touch the glass –
to wipe the discontent away –
to see if i may find you there –
peering in –
desperation eyes –
searching –
longing!
 
but i find only lonely shades of winter –
placid as the frozen sea –
of your indifference!

epitaphs of discontent

we wear our coats of like.

dust off our eager shoes –

step into the arena of ego.

impatiently aware of how we look in the mirror of our suppose.

with disregard for others want,

we impose our need-to-be.

consideration –

program from the pageant of youth –

crumpled,

thrown out the window.

 

how quickly we become –

undone;

companion to indifference.

no compromise.

no regret.

determined to win the race –

regardless the casualties.

 

and even now –

with sunset inviting darkness,

we light one more candle.

no time for rest.

insatiable –

our appetite for admiration.

just one more round of applause.

one more like –

clicked on sad page of immaterial.

 

and recklessly –

with impetuous abandon –

we (without knowing) write epitaphs of discontent –

chiseled in stone (alone).

our un-intention –

our demise.

 

and from this dreamless sleep,

no waking…

 just about now  

 

and just about now,

while the stars shine and the moon is slightly less than full,

we wage wars against ourselves.

in this moment, instead of holding hands, we throw sparks –

rekindle flames –

ignite with fear the fires of discontent.

 

what will it accomplish?

this war of indifference?

if in the end –

when the smoke finally clears –

we find all we’ve conquered –

is good; all that remains –

draped in darkness –

sad shroud of victory worn by kings without crowns –

left only to reign over the grave of morality.

and so it goes…

 

and just about now,

we boast and brag of conquests made in the name of jurisprudence –

encroach upon the boundaries of right and wrong –

yet fail to comprehend the majesty of benevolence.

 

and just about – now –

while making plans to ostracize God from our concept of creation –

we fail to realize the structure of our once great society is falling down –

thin walls of faith,

collapsing in upon themselves,

weakened –

by the senseless acts –

inhumanity of man –

 

and just about now –

the reality of our demise is heard –

not in the roar of mighty storms –

but subtle as the exit of day –

more personal than a whisper of consolation,

from the very lips of death…

 

(and now i lay me down to sleep ,

i pray the Lord,

my soul…)

the implications of a conceptualized god…

God.
some would say – all knowing one.
others,
perhaps – omnipotent.
 
at some point, spoken of –
in close companionship with dear,
and oh my,
and almighty.
or maybe referred to – Argus.
 
whatever your concept of creation –
regardless your attraction to any particular dogmas –
your conviction dictates my perception.
 
i suppose i could be persuaded to believe –
however,
my belief would not be tied to hypothesis –
co-dependent with proof.
(faith)
and so,
the opportunity –
as presented at this juncture –
lies in your ability to convince –
remove doubt from the sanctuary –
of –
my believe…

everything

i long to be – to you –
all that you have become –
to me…
 
that first sliver of sun at dawn,
or the twinkle of twilight’s
first star…
 
if only i could fill your world with wonderful,
exceptional –
smother you with fantastic,
awesomely – amazing…
 
if even for one solitary second
i could be
that which flows through your veins –
fills your heart –
gives you life.
how great the rush.
to be considered something so essential –
so necessary!
 
as much as air –
as incidental as day –
i long to be the impulse for your smile,
casual sigh,
the beat your heart skips…
 
everything to –
you –
to me –
you are…

and sometimes…

sometimes we sing,
un-compromised –
no one listening.
irrelevant – the need to be heard.
sometimes we just cannot contain the emotion –
corral the words back to their silent place –
deep inside.
and so we sing…
sometimes –
the song –
becomes our anthem.
rebellion shouted from lungs trapped in a shell of perceived should-have-been –
could-have-been.
the escape becomes our escape.
the release –
our freedom –
sometimes…
and then –
sometimes –
we no longer hear the music –
and there –
facing the silence –
when we feel we’ve nothing left to say.
before we bow –
final curtain call –
we close our eyes –
and sometimes we just – pray…

simply rocks

i stopped by to paint my mood,
but rain set in and the colors ran muted to grey…
i stopped by to drop off my baggage of frustration –
realized the gates to acceptance were closed –
access denied…
i stopped by – (third time’s the charm) – to trade in my chaos, for calm –
to no avail – (three strikes, you’re out!)…
almost as seldom as never –
generosity chosen instead of obtain.
in this world so full of people,
unimaginable – thoughts of feeling alone.
and yet,
in place of shells with stories to tell,
we end up less than polished stones –
on this shore of life,
unnecessary –
uncollected –
simply – rocks.